Crack Your Fungal Funny Bone with These Mushroom Jokes

We’ve all experienced that moment — maybe waiting in a queue, sitting in a room of friends slinging wisecracks, or trying to get a class’s attention — where a good one-liner is the most priceless thing you can have in mind. And, we’ve all had those beats where thinking up even the simplest joke draws a blank. But if you take the time to learn the best mushroom puns out there, we promise that breaking the ice will never be easier.

You don’t have to be a mycologist or forager to appreciate a certain kind of mushroom humor. A creative spoof can crack a smile and demystify all types of mushrooms at the same time. Heck, you don’t even have to be a foodie — even folks with a dry wit can dig a funny joke, especially if it’s sprouting with creativity for all the mushies this beautiful world has to offer.

Personally, I normally find people who use puns to have questionable morels, but after researching these jokes, I’m starting to find so mushroom in my heart for a good food pun.

Did you hear the joke about fungus? You won’t like it at first, but it’ll grow on you.

Funny mushroom puns for fun-guys (and everyone else)

1. Why do mushroom children behave so well?

   They don’t want to get in truffle.

2. Why is it impossible to have a conversation with a female mushroom?

   Because shiitake too much.

3. Why did the mushroom get stuck in traffic on the way to work?

   It was mush-hour.

4. What does a fast mushroom car sound like?

   “Shroom shroom!”

5. Why did the mushroom hate going to school?

   He was always spored.

6. What made the mushroom farmer a good person?

   He had really good morels.

7. What does a mushroom buy when it’s having a mid-life crisis?

   A spores car.

8. What do mushrooms enjoy eating around a campfire?

   S’pores.

9. What veggie goes best with jacket potatoes?

   Button mushrooms.

10. What did the mushroom request when booking his hotel?

    “A shroom with a view, please!”

11. Why couldn’t the mushroom get into the club?

    He wasn’t mold enough.

12. What did the girl mushroom say to the boy mushroom?

    “You’re a really fungi.”

13. What’s a vampire’s favorite soup?

    Scream of mushroom

14. I took my final exam on magic mushrooms.

    I passed with flying colors!

15. How do you tell a good mushroom from a toxic mushroom?

    Have your friend try it first.

16. Where does the mushroom family keep their rain boots?

    On their porcini

17. What did the mushrooms sing when they won the Closed cup?

    We are the champignons!

18. Where do baby mushrooms grow before they are born?

    In the mushwomb!

19. Mushroom puns are the best for any occasion.

    They are very portabella.

20. What did the fungi say when he was offered seconds at dinner?

    “No thanks. I don’t have mushroom left in my stomach.”

The best mushroom joke is the one you have on hand

So, whether you’re standing in line at the salad bar next to the portobellos, looking for a witticism to whip up an audience, or just want to have a quip on hand to break the tension when you’ve beaten your friends in Mario Kart, consider these loud mushroom puns. Whether you’re telling someone, “I love you so mush,” or that you can’t wait to have a breakfast of champignons, there’s always an opportunity to slip a decomposer joke into the mix. Just don’t put a spore taste in anyone’s mouth, and may the funniest pun take the giant mushroom prize.